The Year We Missed Thanksgiving and Christmas (Sort Of)

Christmas tree in our apartment in 2007.

I've had some very interesting Thanksgivings and Christmas' over the years:

-One of my first Thanksgivings away from home we were in a cross-cultural environment so a bunch of people from different countries got together and told the story of the original American Thanksgiving and then we ate foods from the US, Korea, Malaysia, and other countries.

-There was the one cold Thanksgiving a small group of us Americans gathered together and ate good-old traditional Thanksgiving food and hung out for the day. In that country, my next two Thanksgivings we had a larger group and so it was much more of a party.

-One Christmas, a group of us from a variety of countries got together and had birthday cake for Jesus and shared foods from all over the world.

-Another Christmas, a few of my single friends and I got to share the day with our Slovakian friends and their children. We ate different food, opened presents, and set off fireworks.

Table all set for a Thanksgiving party 2007!

Colorado Christmas 2007

When I moved away from home and was single, I had the chance to explore the meaning of these holidays and my expectations of them. I've only shared one Thanksgiving and two Christmas' in the States since I moved away thirteen years ago.

Thanksgiving has become a time where I've enjoyed eating good food and spending time with those who've become my family wherever I am. We eat, enjoy each other's presence, and thank and glorify God for all that He's done over the last year.

Years ago, I took Santa out of Christmas. In all of the countries that I've lived, Christmas is barely celebrated let alone is there any knowledge of Santa. I love it that way. Christmas, to me, is now about sharing time with those who've become my family wherever I am, eating good food, and celebrating the birth of our Savior. It's a time that brings me tears of gratitude and joy at the wonderful gift that He's given without all of the need to have the perfect gifts for everyone (while also going broke) or about the fancy decorations but instead making it simple. Don't get me wrong, I'm not against these things, but I can see how they can become distractions to the most important Reason for the celebration.

Fast forward to 2013:

It's been a year of change! Romany and I got married almost a year ago and so it was our second Thanksgiving and Christmas together and first as a married couple. In June, we found out I was pregnant and so life started to change once again! We're finally semi-settled in a place and I was starting to really enjoy cooking.

I had it all planned. Make lots of traditional Thanksgiving foods, eat lunch with another cross-cultural family, and enjoy time together thanking God for all He's done over the last year. Romany and I would then share a quiet Christmas together enjoying traditional foods, exchanging gifts, and spending time worshiping and thanking God for His Gift to us. How perfect is was going to be for our first Christmas as a family!

Two weeks before Thanksgiving I had a little bleeding and the doctor put me on bed rest. Thinking that it wasn't going to be for long, we still made our plans for our celebration. Just before Thanksgiving, I had more bleeding and I was put on more strict bed rest and so our plans came to a screeching halt. Thus began my season of bed rest...six and a half weeks and counting.

Oh how disappointed I've been that our holidays couldn't be as I was expecting it! No good, traditional food or the fun of trying to make them. No present for Romany since I couldn't make it to a store to buy anything. No friends to spend Thanksgiving with. Only a few decorations up to help keep us in the holiday spirit along with a Thanksgiving meal supplied by TGI Fridays.

TGI Fridays Thanksgiving Dinner 2013

Christmas decorations 2013

How frustrating it is when our expectations get dashed! I have to admit, it's been hard for me to see the joy in the season without those things that help to make it the holidays for me. Romany hasn't been in the same boat since he doesn't have expectations for a “Western” style holiday season.

“And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in swaddling cloths and laid him in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn.” (Luke 2:7)

I'm sure that this wasn't quite was Mary, a young mother, was expecting for the birth of her firstborn son, let alone the Savior.

Isn't that just like God? Sometimes I find that He likes to bless us and meets or exceeds our expectations. What joy we have in those times! We thank God or pat ourselves on the back for making everything turn out right.

Sometimes, though, I think that in His faithfulness, He goes against our expectations. How we loath these times! We fall into depression or yell and hate God for our misfortune becoming disillusioned of God.

If Mary could see the whole picture (though I'm sure she had some idea), she could have seen her frustrated expectations in a new way. With a different perspective, she could have found joy and hope in the fact that the Savior was born so that He could be called:

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” (Isaiah 9:6)

So, we didn't really miss Thanksgiving and Christmas. We had the opportunity to celebrate a little, though just not in the way that I was hoping or expecting. I do regret, though, that my frustrated expectations were much of my focus of the season instead of seeing the whole situation through God's perspective:

-It's a season of rest. It is what I need and what God has been teaching me about for several years now.

-It's a season of preparation. It's a time for me to prepare my heart to receive the little one growing within me.

-It's a season of intimacy. What other time in my life will I have so much time with God to dream and plan and prepare? What other chance will Romany and I have to spend so much time together to just enjoy each other's presence?

-It's a season of growth. The little baby inside of me is growing well and strong! Nothing else is worth all of this time in bed! In addition, I feel God helping me to grow in unseen ways which I'm sure will be revealed in time.

-It's a season of dependence. As I wrote before, I'm learning a lot about leaning on others, asking for help, and just receiving which are quite challenging!

-It's a season of joy and hope. I'm starting to find the joy and hope in the small things, though this is challenging for me.

-It's a season of thanksgiving. It's a time for me to thank Him for all that He has done and all that He is doing! May He be praised and honored for He is the one who gives life, freedom, healing, hope, love, and relationship to all of those who come to Him. What better reason to celebrate no matter the external circumstances!